What
does it mean,“…after you have suffered a little while…” or after a “season of suffering?” (1 Peter 5:10
NLT). This verse implies that there will be “a little” suffering to some degree or duration, but it will pass. I
will be using the terms “seasons of suffering,” and tests, or trails, or
tribulations interchangeably.
Therefore, suffering,
no matter how severe, is temporary and the bible says, “…the
suffering of this present time ARE NOT worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed
in us…” (Romans 8:18 KJV). “For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more
exceeding and eternal weight of glory” (2
Corinthians 4:17 KJV).
It is comforting to
know Jesus suffers with us, enables us to endure suffering, absorbs the pain of
our suffering, and took our suffering on the cross; we STILL have to go through it. ,“…after YOU have suffered a little while…” (1 Peter 5:10
NLT).
“Seasons of suffering”
may include: the loss of a significant love one, an unexpected medical
diagnosis, a divorce, infidelity, a wayward child, loss of viable income,
reduction in wealth, a foreclosure on a home, some type of disability, a type
of abuse, brain surgery, rape, incest, war injuries, mental illness, or any
number of horrendous experiences. “... We [face]… conflict from every
direction, with battles on the outside and fear on the inside…” (2
Corinthians 7:5 KJV).
Our initial reactions
are not necessarily spiritual. We are only human and “seasons of suffering”
usually rock us to the very core. Job was only human and was of course,
saddened and heartbroken over this loses: “Then Job arose and tore his robe and shaved his head (OT behaviors for sadness,
grief, or sorrow)…” (Job 1:20-22 NASB).
Job went through a horrific
“season of suffering” and felt all the common emotions about it. “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” (Mark 9:24 NIV). Even if you are a believer and
believe in all the benefits of God’s promises; you are only human.
It is typical to go
through a period of doubt, or sadness, or grief, or attitude. “…I walk around filled with grief…” (Psalms 38:6 NLT). Even though Jesus was the
resurrection and the life, he was sad about Lazarus’ death. “….Jesus wept…” (John 11:25, 35 KJV).
“Seasons of suffering” will
elicit a response of shock, sadness, confusion, questions, fear, grief, or disappointment.
“I am bent over and racked with pain. All day long I walk around filled with grief…” (Psalms 38:6 NLT). “Seasons of suffering” can rip through the heart like a bulldozer
and suddenly you are propelled into some alternate reality. King David said, “…I am desolate and afflicted. The troubles of my
heart are enlarged: O bring thou me out of my distresses. Look
upon mine affliction…” (Psalms 25:16-18 KJV)..
When “seasons of
suffering” appear on the scenes of our life, they are hard to accept.
“Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted within me?” (Psalm 43:5 KJV) .One moment Job had a huge family and next moment, he had no family at all. “Then Job arose and tore his robe and shaved his head…” (Job 1:20-22 NASB).
“Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted within me?” (Psalm 43:5 KJV) .One moment Job had a huge family and next moment, he had no family at all. “Then Job arose and tore his robe and shaved his head…” (Job 1:20-22 NASB).
The reality of that
kind of drastic change is overwhelming and hard for the human psyche to
comprehend initially. “They suffer painfully; their life is full of
trouble” (Job 14:22 NLT).
Job’s “season of
suffering” started like this: “One day
when Job’s sons and daughters were feasting and drinking wine at the oldest
brother’s house, a messenger came to Job and said, “The oxen were plowing and the
donkeys were grazing nearby, and the Sabeans attacked
and made off with them. They put the servants to the sword, and I am the only
one who has escaped to tell you!” While he was still speaking, another
messenger came and said, “The fire of God fell from the heavens and burned up
the sheep and the servants, and I am the only one who has escaped to tell you!”
While he was still speaking, another messenger came and said, “The Chaldeans
formed three raiding parties and swept down on your camels and made off with
them. They put the servants to the sword, and I am the only one who has escaped
to tell you!” While he was still speaking, yet another messenger came and said,
“Your sons and daughters were feasting and drinking wine at the oldest
brother’s house, when suddenly a mighty wind swept in
from the desert and struck the four corners of the house. It collapsed on them
and they are dead, and I am the only one who has escaped to tell you!”
(Job 1:13-20 NIV).
This “season of suffering”
included Job’s health. “…Satan….smote Job
with boils from the sole of his feet unto his crown…” (Job 2:7 KJV).
This “season of
suffering” included relational issues too. His wife said, “…Doest thou still retain thine integrity?
Curse God and die…” (Job 2:9 KJV).
“Then Job arose and tore his robe and shaved his head (ancient Near East behavior
for sadness or sorrow)…” (Job
1:20-22 NASB).
These are some harsh
loses -family, prosperity, status, health, relationships – and sudden losses
leave you with a sense of helplessness, or loss of control.
When I received the
news that I had a brain bleed I didn’t believe it. I went through a period of
denial. This happens to other people, not
me. I didn’t blame God. I didn’t blame anyone. It wasn’t hereditary, so I
couldn’t blame my family either.
My brain bleed was
caused by an arteriovenous malformation or AVM for short. It was a one in a
million medical condition and I was the statistical one in the million.
Once I was diagnosed
everything happened swiftly after that and before I could blink I was at
Georgetown University Hospital. I was admitted on a Wednesday and on the
following Tuesday I was scheduled to have brain surgery. However, I had a
seizure instead and ended up having surgery two days later. I was in a coma for
a few days and stayed in ICU for almost a month.
After ICU, I was sent
to Medstar National Rehabilitation Hospital for another two months. During my
stay in the Rehab Hospital I was inundated with daily therapy sessions, such as
occupational therapy, speech therapy, and physical therapy. In addition, I was
assigned a neuropsychologist.
While talking to the
neuropsychologist I realized I was angry and she did too. Initially, I didn’t
know what I was angry about, but I was angry nonetheless. It takes a while for your
mind to catch up with the reality of your new situation. While being counseled,
I learned I was now considered disabled. I wasn’t ready to face that. I asked
one of the nurses “Who you calling
disabled?” She said, “YOU.” I wasn’t ready to face that.
It was true nonetheless
and my new, unescapable vulnerability also made me angry. I was totally dependent
on others for my care. I was so emotional about it and would cry at the drop of
a hat for no consciousable reason. My anger had no real target either, but I
was mad at everything and everybody anyway. Deep inside I knew it was no one’s
fault, yet I was angry that the brain bleed happened in the first place.
I tried to control the
anger, because I would feel guilty for taking my attitude out on someone else.
I had to apologize to my neuropsychologist on a couple of occasions. Why was I
angry? I had lost my health and I was now considered disabled because my brain
surgery had highly impacted my balance.
Loss, whatever the loss,
always paves the way for grief. “…I
walk around filled with grief…”
(Psalms 38:6 NLT). Grieving is unique to each individual and
is an extremely personal process. Grief has no steps or levels, or stages, or exact
procedures; it requires healing time.
After a period of anger
I went through a mild period of depression. I am normally an optimistic
individual, but my imbalance limited my independence and mobility. I couldn’t
drive or do things “I” wanted to do, but was at the mercy of others.
It made me sad. I missed my own lifestyle, my own independence, and my own personal
interest.
Living with imbalance,
due to an AVM, is challenging and SLOW to heal. I learned medical doctors treat
you, but only God can truly heal you. I had to come to the reality that my disability,
caused by my brain surgery, was in God’s hand. God was healing me in his timing
and on his schedule.
In the meantime, I made
the best of my time by reaching out and accepting the love and support of
friends and family. In addition, I wrote books, which I enjoyed and it made me
feel better by giving me a sense of purpose. In fact, you are reading one of
them now.
Eventually, I began to
accept my “season of suffering” as temporary and made my peace with the
process. This is the part of the process where I truly began to “… [entrust myself] to
him who judges justly…” (1 Peter 2:20-23 NIV).
“…I [began to learn] … to be content whatever the circumstances. I know [now] what it is
to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I … learned the secret of being content in any and every situation,
whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want”
Philippians 4:11-12 NIV). Truly, “I can do all
things through Christ which strengtheneth me.” (Philippians
4:13 KJV).
Learning to trust God,
during a “season of suffering,” is a deeply personal experience. God can help
you process through a “season of suffering” better than anyone. God understands
suffering. “…Christ suffered for you, …”
(1 Peter 2:20-23 NIV).Thus God will lead, guide, and comfort you through
suffering and all the emotions involved in this process. “…Blessed are they that mourn: for they
shall be comforted...”
(Matthew 5:4 KJV).
Friends and family are
very helpful, but sometimes it is difficult to share the challenge or depth of
your journey with them like you can with God. “..[Jesus is able]… to empathize with our weaknesses…” (Hebrews 4:15 NIV). With God you can face the emotion grief
and sadness that comes with the “season of suffering” and God understands in a
way that promotes supernatural healing. “Blessed
be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and
the God of all comfort; Who comforteth us in all our tribulation…”(2
Corinthians 1:3-4 KJV).
I absolutely DID NOT like this “season of suffering”
It radically changed my entire life; literally. I went from a comfortable, but unexciting
complacency to an uncomfortable, but exciting walk of faith. Eventually, my uncomfortable,
but exciting walk of faith became my peaceful contentment.
“…I [learned] … to be content
whatever the circumstances. I … learned the secret of
being content in any and every situation…”
Philippians 4:11-12 NIV). “I can do all
things through Christ which strengtheneth me.” (Philippians
4:13 KJV).
I had prayed for God to
change several things in my life, but I think I wanted him to change them my
way so that my life remained comfortably complacent in the process. That’s not
God’s style. "…Behold, I will do something new, Now
it will spring forth; Will you not be aware of
it? I will even make a
roadway in the
wilderness…” (Isaiah 43:19-20 NASB).
"I am the LORD, that is My name; I will not
give My glory to another, Nor My praise to graven images."Behold, the former things have come to pass, Now I declare new things; Before they spring forth I proclaim them to you." (Isaiah 42:9 NASB).
If you want “something
new” you are asking God for something fresh, unfamiliar, or different, right?
So what will God do? “I
will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along “unfamiliar” paths I will guide
them; I will turn the
darkness into light before them and make
the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them” (Isaiah 42:16 NIV).
Don’t ask God for change and continue to
hold on to your comfort and complacency for dear life. “…“You skillfully ….hold on to your own
tradition...” (Mark 7:9 NLT). A “season of suffering,” no
matter how devastating, may be your answer to prayer. God “… is able to do [or answer prayer]… exceeding
abundantly above all that we ask or think…” (Ephesians 3:20 KJV). Hard trials will make you
question God and wonder how this “suffering” is answering your prayer. Yet, “…[entrust yourself]…to him who judges justly” (1 Peter 2:19-23
NIV). ).
And remember, “…Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart
of man, the
things which God hath prepared for them that love him” (1
Corinthians 2:9 KJV). So like it or not, a “season of suffering” demonstrates that
many of God’s ways are simply “…past [our ability] to [find them]
out…” (Romans 11:33 KJV).
My conclusion to these
truths is that God is in control and I am NOT. Comfortable complacency is about
“YOUR” control. Taking a risk and walking by faith may seem the same and feel
the same, but they have very different foundations. One is based on a whim or
your control and the other is based on God and his control. “… I am
God, and there is none else… I am God, and
there is none like me…I will do all my pleasure…" (Isaiah
46:9-10 KJV).
"Remember
the former things of old: for I am God,
and there is none else; I am God, and there
is none like me, Declaring the end from the beginning, and from ancient times
the things that are not yet done, saying, My counsel shall stand, and I will do all my
pleasure…" (Isaiah 46:9-10 KJV).
“See
now that I, even I, am he, and there is no god with me: I kill, and I make
alive; I wound, and I heal: neither is there any that can deliver out of my hand"(Deuteronomy
32:39 KJV).
“God
that made the world and all things therein, seeing that he is Lord of heaven and earth,
dwelleth not in temples made with hands; Neither is worshipped with men's
hands, as though he needed any thing, seeing he giveth to all life, and breath,
and all things." (Acts 17:24-25 KJV).
I didn’t like what had
happened to me, but I AM NOT in control.
“...O man,
who art thou that repliest against God? Shall the thing formed say to him that
formed it, Why hast thou made me thus? Hath not the potter power over the clay...?”
(Romans 9:20-21 KJV).
I had to face the
truth. I AM NOT in control. God is
in control. “…How do you know what your
life will be like tomorrow? Your life is like the morning fog—it’s here a
little while, then it’s gone.
What you ought to say is, “If the Lord wants us to, we will live and do this or that.”
Otherwise you are boasting about your own pretentious plans,
and all such boasting is evil” (James
415-16 NLT). “…For that ye ought to say, If the Lord will, we shall live, and do
this, or that” (James 4:16 KJV).
I had a brain bleed. I
couldn’t heal myself. I couldn’t make my balance return when “I”
wanted it to return or in my timing. I
couldn’t be independent. I couldn’t drive. I couldn’t go where and when I
wanted to go. I couldn’t be in my own home. I couldn’t live the life I once
lived. I couldn’t live in my own state. I couldn’t make people around me act the
way I wanted them to act. I couldn’t. I couldn’t. I couldn’t. My control took a
roller coaster ride right off the tracks. “…If the Lord
will, [I] shall live,
and do this, or that...” (James 4:16 KJV).
I
DON’T run the show; I’m NOT in control, and I DON’T do what I want to do.”
The bible says, “…those who walk in pride
(self-control and not God’s). [God] is able
to humble” (Daniel 4:37 NIV). “…If the Lord
will, [I] shall live,
and do this, or that...” (James 4:16 KJV).
I thought I had given
God control, but not total control. I needed to grow deeper in humility and
respect for God’s sovereign control. This is so new and so fresh I am still undergoing
the lesson. But I will share it with you in hope it will help you. Before my
brain bleed I was already going through a long
“season of suffering.” Years, in fact. I had given up, grown weary, yet I had become
comfortably complacent about it.
First of all, I had
accepted the “season of suffering” as my faithfulness to God, but not necessarily
his faithfulness to me. “Poor me” I underwent
my long-term test thinking I’m being a martyr for Christ and enduring my share
of suffering. I wasn’t, however I was
walking in complacency, but not faith.
I had learned to adapt
to my test and control its impact to
a certain degree. In the beginning of my journey, I was more fervent about overcoming
my test by faith, but as time tarried on my enthusiasm faded. I had come to the
conclusion that God wasn’t going to change my situation and maybe he couldn’t
change it anyway.
So I adapted to the
“season of suffering” and became comfortably complacent about it. I remained
faithful and loyal to God, but had grown weary, given up, lost interest, laid
it down, and became detached from ever overcoming my test.
My prayer about the
“season of suffering” went from asking God to give me the strength to overcome
it to give me the strength to live through it. We actually need both; the
strength to overcome and the strength to get through; I was ONLY praying for
the strength to get through.
In all honesty, I felt
my “season of suffering” was like Lazarus, buried so long; “… by this time, [it] stinketh: for [it]…hath
been dead for …[years] …” (John 11:39 KJV). I still had some small tidbits
of hope, but I felt if God could truly change it; it wouldn’t have died. I
related to Martha feelings. “… As soon as she heard that Jesus was coming …
Lord, if thou hadst been here, my brother had not died… ” (John 11:20-22 KJV).
After so many years, I concluded that God
had abandoned me in my long-term “season of suffering” and I was “humbly”
accepting it by becoming complacent. Whether I knew it or not, I wasn’t walking
by faith to overcome the test, but simple to get through. “…In the world ye have
tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33 ASV). I believed this verse, but not for my
particular test.
I
prayed and depended on Jesus for many other things, but NOT my long “season of
suffering” This test had become like a brick wall to me and was getting thicker
as time travelled on. Somewhere along the way, I laid my hope down. I
heard God say through Jesus “...I have
overcome…” (John 6:33 KJV). If Jesus
said “I have overcome…” then I have
too! I win, right?!!! I had laid that truth down regarding my “season of
suffering.”
In addition, without knowing it; I was
doubting God’s ability to overcome it, control it, change it, fix it, or do the
impossible with it. The long, enduring test made no sense to me anymore, too
many years had passed, the persistent trial was a constant neon sign, and
evidently God couldn’t overcome this one.
Neither could I, I was tired, without hope,
and weak. Did I lay my hope down, during my “season of suffering,” because I
didn’t believe “I”
could overcome it or that God couldn’t? When did I start thinking I was in
control of the test or its outcome? When did I start believing in my puny power
and not that of Almighty God? I know how Job felt when he said, “…Now I have seen you with my
own eyes. I take back
everything I said [and did], and I sit in dust and ashes
to show my repentance” (Job 42:1-6 NLT).
I AM FINITE. I AM NOT IN CONTROL. I CAN’T
DO ANYTHING MIRACULOUS WITHOUT GOD. IT IS GOD’S WILL THAT IS TO BE DONE AND NOT
MINE. IT IS GOD’S WILL TO BE DONE, IN HIS TIMING AND NOT MINE. I AM JUST A
VESSEL. I AM THE CLAY AND HE IS THE POTTER. WITHOUT GOD, I CAN DO NOTHING AND I
AM WEAK, but GOD!!
It is hard to look at the places you have
held on to your pride. Only God knows what it will take to get your attention
and humble you. Pride will puff you up falsely, but God will humble you authentically.
Even during a test, you can begin to think more highly of yourself than you
should.
When did I take control of my test from God?
What made me think “I” could turn it around? Laying down my hope was
the same as falling down. “Pride [goeth]
before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall” (Proverbs 16:18
KJV). “A man's pride shall bring him low…”
(Proverbs 29:23 KJV). “For if a
man think himself to be something, when he is nothing, he deceiveth himself”
(Galatians 6:3 KJV).
I didn’t know that pride was an issue until
my brain bleed, but God did. Thankfully, God, “…you have searched me, Lord, and you know me …you are familiar with all my ways” (Psalm
139:1-3 KJV). “…And those who walk in pride …[God] is able to humble” (Daniel 4 NIV).
It took my LONG “season of suffering” and
my new “season of suffering to teach me that. Only the sovereign God knows how
to work “…all things ... together for GOOD to them that LOVE GOD, to them who are THE CALLED
to his purpose” (Romans 8:28 KJV). This good comes out of all the suffering
and pain. Satan “…intended to
harm me, but God
intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the
saving of many lives” Genesis 50:20 NIV).
My suffering has proved God’s love yet
again and his desire for my utmost holiness. We continue to love him deeper and
deeper, because he continues to show the depth of his love for us. “We love,
because he first loved us” (1 John 4:19 ASV).
Satan “…intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done,
the saving of many lives” Genesis 50:20 NIV). God cancels Satan’s intended
harm and overrules it by working “…all things ... together for GOOD… ”
(Romans 8:28 KJV).
Satan may form destructive events against us,
but they won’t prosper. “No weapon that is
formed against thee shall prosper; and every tongue that shall rise against thee in judgment thou
shalt condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD,
and their righteousness is of me, saith the LORD” (Isaiah 54:17
KJV).
Satan may form his many events and devices
and we may grow tired, weary, hopeless, and weak in the process. “… I can of mine own self do nothing…”
John 5:30 KJV). I admit, I had grown
tired from my LONG “season of suffering” as well as weary, hopeless, and weak, but
GOD!!! ). “…I will
supply all your NEED…” (John 12:32 KJV). KJV). HALLELUJAH!!!
When I was at my utmost weakest, my
faithful Creator, says I was the strongest!!! “…“My grace is
sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all
the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me” (2
Corinthians 12:9 NIV).
“….apart from Me, you
can do nothing…”(John 15:5 NIV). However, “…I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me (Philippians
4:13 KJV). “…for my power is made
perfect in weakness…” (2 Corinthians
12:9 NIV). Even though, I got weak and weary God’s, “ grace [became]…sufficient for me..." (2 Corinthians 12:9 NIV).
In both of my “seasons of
suffering” God’s grace is revealed, experienced, and undeservingly available to
me in abundance.!! “…the incomparable
riches of his GRACE,
expressed in his kindness in Christ Jesus...” “…My God will supply all [my need]… according
to His riches in glory in
Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:19 NASB). “…what
is the riches of the glory…; …CHRIST IN YOU…” (Colossians 1:25-28 KJV). “…I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me (Philippians
4:13 KJV).
Thus, I have NO CHOICE, but to
be victorious and overcome “in” Christ Jesus. “…In this [fallen] world [I] shall have
tribulation (no matter how LONG): but [I
can]…be of good cheer, [God has]… OVERCOME the world…” (John 16:33 KJV).
Jesus is assuring you of the victory and is deeming it already
DONE and WON. Whatever the “season of suffering” or test, or trial, or
tribulation, Jesus has already overcome it and his victory is YOURS too. “These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have
peace..…In this [fallen] world [I]
shall have tribulation (no matter how LONG): but [I can]…be of good cheer, [God has]… OVERCOME the
world…” (John 16:33 KJV).
I had grown weak in my LONG “season of
suffering” Your own, lonely self-effort will run out of steam pretty quickly,
during a test, without relying on the grace and sufficiency of God. I probably
said, “…Father,… take this cup
from Me; …not [your] will, but [mine]… be done…" (Luke 22:42-43 NIV). Whether I was aware I was saying it or
not, I took that stance.
Jesus asked God to take his cup or “season
of suffering” from him, but I laid my down without
asking permission. Jesus said, “…Father, if you are willing,
take this cup from Me; yet not My will, but Yours be done" (Luke 22:42-43 NIV).
My hope for overcoming my “season of
suffering” was gone with the wind, but
GOD!!! “O the depth of the riches
both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! how unsearchable are his judgments,
and his ways past finding out! For who hath known the mind of the Lord? Or who
hath been his counsellor?” (Romans 11:33-34 KJV).
In the story of Lazarus it seems Jesus
didn’t come to the situation “on time.” “Then said Martha unto Jesus, Lord if thou
hadst been there, my brother had not died” (John 11:21 KJV). My
test would not have died.
At least that was the opinion of those in
the biblical context. I felt that way too. My hope sadly died for my “season of
suffering” especially after all I thought I did to stand in faith! What is the
point of trusting Jesus if your “season of suffering” ends in defeat or gets
worst ANYWAY?
I
In the story of Lazarus, Jesus did not
come visually to the situation until death had occurred. What is the point of
showing up AFTER death? It’s over and the situation is a bust, so why is Jesus
showing up now? Jesus does this for a reason.
However, this is the place many of us “give
up” or accuse God of not working things out the way they wanted them to work
out or the way HE claimed it would (Romans 8:28). I am guilty of having this
attitude.
One of Lazarus’ sisters said, “… as soon as she heard that
Jesus was coming … Lord, if thou hadst been here, my brother had not died… ” (John 11:20-22 KJV). Martha accused Jesus of not being there and
implied it was TOO LATE, so she told him “…
Lord, by this time, he stinketh: for he hath been dead for four days …”
(John 11:39 KJV).
WHO AM I TO QUESTION
GOD? WHO AM I TO QUESTION HIS POWER, HIS TIMING, OR SOVEREIGNTY? “…the things which are impossible with men are
possible with God…” (Luke 18:27 KJV). “…Jesus said…I am the
resurrection and I am the life…..” (John 11:25 kJV). My “season
of suffering” was death to MY CONTROL, my finite power to change it, and my inability
to hope in its resurrection or its life, but GOD!!!
Jesus shows up on the scene of your
“season of suffering” in his timing, with the purpose of giving you a GREATER
outcome!!! While Martha and Mary were being comforted by friends and family, Jesus
had something better in mind. (John 11:17-22).
My “season of suffering” was dead, but
after my brain bleed, God said, “…only believe” (Mark 5:36 KJV). God is not limited by
ANYTHING, a tidbit of hope or a mustard seed of hope WILL MOVE MOUNTAINS!! Look what happened, “And he that was dead came forth, bound hand and foot with graveclothes:
and his face was bound about with a napkin. Jesus saith unto them, Loose him,
and let him go...” (John 11:43-44 KJV).
I had to “…[entrust myself]… to HIM who judges justly…”
(1 Peter 2:20-23 NIV). Jesus goes BEYOND what you can
see, your timing, what you can endure, what you can control, or comprehend.
Nothing is dead until Jesus says it’s dead!! “…Jesus said…I am the resurrection and I am the life…..”
(John 11:25 KJV).
I realized God loves me dearly and deeply.
He created me to overcome, he gave me victory in Jesus, and NOW nothing is
impossible for me either. Jesus asked
Mary and Martha, “…where have ye laid him?..’ (John 11:34 KJV). God used that same
verse to ask me where had I laid my hope down in my “season of suffering.” “…Jesus saith unto to her, ‘Said I not unto to
thee, that, if
thou wouldest believe, thou shouldest see the glory of God’…”
(John 11:40 KJV).
My brain bleed came to help me grow
spiritually, to renew, to restore, to develop, to strengthen my faith, to
humble me, to fill me with hope, to gain further respect for God’s sovereign
control, and to draw me even closer to him. HALLELUJAH!!!!
God didn’t want me limited by my human,
finite abilities, complacencies, and reasonings, but by the unlimited power of
faith in the Living God. The bible says,
“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways
acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths”
(Proverbs 3:5-6 KJV).
When “seasons of
suffering” make no “human” sense and time, invested in years, continue to pass;
Jesus says, “….. be not afraid, only
believe” (Mark 5:36 KJV).
I am glad God loves me.
I am glad he remembered my prayers before I lost hope. I am glad he remains
faithful, even when I don’t. I am glad God keeps his word and promises, even
when I forget them! Grace and mercy, because of God, does follows me ALL the
days of my life, even when I stop being aware of it (Psalms 23). Praise God who is able “… to do far more abundantly beyond all
that we ask or think, according
to the power that works within us” (Ephesians 3:20 NASB).
I am again reminded to, “…only believe” (Mark
5:36 KJV). I still don’t understanding the LONG “season of suffering” or my
brain bleed, but I accept “…his
ways [are]… past finding out…” (Romans 11:33-34 KJV). I firmly believe
that, “…]my] eye hath not seen, nor ear
heard, neither have entered into [my[ ...heart ... the things which God
hath prepared for [me]...who [loves]... Him.” (1 Corinthians 2:9 KJV).
In regard to my LONG “season of suffering”
and brain bleed I have the GUARANTEED VICTORY!! I AM REJOICING. JESUS HAS
SPOKEN. “…I am the
resurrection and I am the life…..” (John 11:25 KJV). “…In this [fallen] world ye shall have
tribulation: but be of good cheer, [God has]… OVERCOME the world…” (John
16:33 KJV).
“And [the situation]… that was dead [has come] forth, …Jesus saith unto [it
‘I have overcome the world’], Loose [the situation]…, and let [it] go...”
(John 11:43-44 KJV). “…Jesus
saith unto to her, ‘Said I not unto to thee, that, if thou wouldest believe, thou
shouldest see the glory of God’…” (John 11:40 KJV). “…Believest thou
this?” (John 8:51 KJV).
I BELIEVE AND IT IS WON!!!
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